Ava Gardner, The Secret Conversations by Peter Evans and Ava Gardner (2013)

Wish I’d been on a bender with Ava. Can see myself now, belly at the bar – ‘nother ‘alf, Ava?

Here she is on sex, booze and buying the farm.

They’d say, ‘Who’s got good legs and nice tits and isn’t filming? Okay, Ava, you’ll do; report to the stills gallery.’

This is the gal who put the rum into rumpy-pumpy and whose boy pals included no less than Mickey Rooney, Artie Shaw, Frank Sinatra, Howard Hughes and Ernest Hemingway.

With Hughes, it was a bit stormy.

…He’d only take me in his arms if he wanted sex – or to stop me from hitting him.

She did actually nearly kill him one time.

I hit him with an ashtray, I think it was onyx. Anyway, it was heavy. I practically had him laid out on a slab. We fought all the time but I nearly put a lily in his hand that night.

The I think it was onyx followed by a qualifying anyway, it was heavy tickles me. (Note to self: beware ladies toting lilies.)

You ever had a zombie? Oh, you’d remember if you had: Bacardi, dark rum, light rum, pineapple juice, lime juice, apricot brandy, orange juice, a sprig of mint and a cherry. Only I always told them to hold the mint and cherry.

Well, she made it through all the booze and boinking to a grand ol’ 67. Before they put me to bed with a shovel, she said, The thing is, I’ve survived.

I dodged all the bullets that had my name on them. I have to be grateful for that. But it does remind you of your mortality when you hear them whistle by.

I’m off to buy some cherries.

Thanks for being here.

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Guy Nicholls

Writer and book bore.

2 thoughts on “Ava Gardner, The Secret Conversations by Peter Evans and Ava Gardner (2013)”

  1. Cheers. I agree, and many autobiographies can be overly wanky. However, this one’s slightly different in that it isn’t strictly ‘autobiographical’, as it’s presented as conversations between the writer Peter and Ava. So it kind of leans towards and interview in places. x

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